Jul 13
As noted previously, Scripture is replete in telling us what to do in the event of a communication breakdown – go and fix it – but it does not spell out the steps to follow in bringing about reconciliation. Apparently, this is a task for the Bible teacher. A – State the case non-accusatorially: “I …
Jul 04
We closed last time with the statement: The hardest thing to give is in. Giving in, however, is not giving up. Giving in is taking the first step to reconciliation as Jesus commanded. Jesus spoke to this issue from two perspectives first in Matthew 5:23-24 and second in Matthew 18:15-17. First He said, “Therefore …
Jun 28
As pointed out previously: There is always a certain amount of right and a certain amount of wrong on both sides of every issue. Trying to determine who is most right and who is most wrong will never resolve the issue. In fact it will only drive the wedge of separation deeper. Scripture states …
Jun 22
I often remark, It is funny how two people see the same thing differently – funny peculiar not funny ha-ha. The oldest form of problem solving is blame shifting. We read about it in Genesis 3:11b-12: God asked Adam, “Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat? …
Jun 14
One subject matter to be explored is entitled: Know What Makes Your Spouse Tick – Not What Ticks Your Spouse. This article, however, will zero in on what ticks almost everyone – Performance Based Acceptance (PBA). Earlier in this series we explored the thought Comparison Is Spelled K-I-L-L-E-R. We learned anytime a comparison is …
Jun 07
Root Level is not new terminology in the field of counseling, but different techniques for solving problems see the Root Level differently. Through this series we have pointed out facts about problems in general such as: Problems are solutions in disguise There is no change if there is no change Attack the problem and …
May 31
It has been stated in previous articles it is essential to determine which tire went flat first and then begin to do what is necessary to inflate it. Although our diagram and explanations started with the Physical Tire, it is the Spiritual Tire that usually goes flat first. In the face of difficulties have …
May 24
It is true God gave us every emotion we are able to express ranging from pure delight and joy to life destroying anger and bitterness. BUT He did not give us this range of emotions to think with – He gave us a brain. We dealt with inflating the mental tire last time. Although, …
May 17
As previously alluded to the mental tire in this illustration relates to human cognition rather than mental illnesses. The successful application of this tool is to recognize which one of life’s four tires went flat first and attend to properly inflating it. A combination of several tools previously taught, and now applied, will aid …
May 11
For more than 25 years I have been teaching this tool, and have always started with the physical tire for reasons noted in my previous post dated May 4th. Recently I received the following quote in my Inbox by Brian Tracy who is an International Motivator. “Just as your car runs more smoothly and …
May 03
To illustrate the mechanics of this problem-solving tool envision driving a four-wheel vehicle on any highway when suddenly one tire goes flat. In some situations it may not be possible to pull off the road to get out of the flow of traffic. You must continue to keep up with the flow of traffic in …
Apr 26
This is the primary problem-solving tool employed by this ministry. There are many important tools that precede this one, and there are more tools to apply in completing the problem solving process. But this is key. Life’s tires are delineated as the physical, mental, emotional and Spiritual. By mental tire I am intending to …
Apr 20
Let me start with the conclusion then build my case to support it. A brief word-study of the Greek is warranted here to embrace the full impact of John’s statements in Chapter 8 Verse 32 and expounded upon in Verse 36: “And ye shall know the truth, and the truth* shall make you free**.” …
Apr 12
Two words that are conspicuous, to me, because of their absence in the King James Version (KJV) of the Bible are assume and compromise. To me, John 8:32 speaks of the opposite of assume, “And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” Personally, I assume nothing in my processes …
Apr 05
Last time we saw God holds each one of us personally responsible for what we think, say and do. God only knows what we think; and He alone hears everything we say and sees everything we do. What is the danger regarding rationalization in this context? In the decision making process people often rationalize …
Mar 29
God holds individuals personally responsible for what they think, say and do. This phrase encapsulates all we have learned about speaking and hearing since starting this series September 8, 2014. Since this is so, a review is in order. When we dealt with one of the three levels of change, i.e. the situational level, …
Mar 22
What is on the inside of you makes the difference as to what you hear. Illustration: Everything I am telling you now you are processing through what you already know or believe (what is on the inside of you) about this subject. And there is nothing wrong in doing so. In fact, sometimes it …
Mar 16
One of our closing thoughts last time taught us that the mind has a mind of its own. Individuals can choose to remember or choose to block out the memory of things depending on the value or lack of value of that thought. Often thoughts are buried deeply during difficult episodes in life. They …
Mar 08
This title, Blame Keeps Wounds Open, is an incomplete statement. The balance of the statement is: Only Forgiveness Heals. The last article was concluded with the truism: The Bowl That Holds the Acid is Eaten by the Acid. This Acid can be un-resolved anger and/or un-resolved resentment. This Acid can also be un-forgiveness. And …
Mar 01
Last time we learned, we can change our actions faster than we can change our feelings. One of the hallmark Scriptures regarding anger is found in Ephesians 4:26-27 which admonishes the reader: “Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil.” Dr. …
